Wednesday, June 9, 2010

Love like the ocean

One of my fears in coming here was that I would fall in love with the children and then have to leave them. I've fallen hard, my friends. I have the previllage of playing with angels. They've stolen my heart. No price is high enough to see their precious smiles or to hear their beautiful laughs. These are truly God's blessings to the world.

While trying to find ways to make these little ones laugh and smile (lots of tickles and funny faces), I started singing to them. As my mind searched for songs, I remembered the one that talks about having peace like a river, joy like a fountain, and love like the ocean. In this, God calmed my fear. Yes, I'm loving these little ones recklessly, but God has given me love like an ocean. He continues to fill up my love tank for these sweet kiddos. And though my heart will break when the day to say goodbye comes, God's love will fill this hole as well.

Last night, one of these preious little ones, Kelly, passed away. I didn't know this little angel, but it brought me to the reality that I may not only be far from my babies, but may loss them entirely on this earth. Most that have stolen my heart are HIV positive. The haven that they're staying in was built as a hospice, but thanks to medical treatment the children are living! Praise the LORD! Still, knowing that their lives are fragile only makes me love them more intensely. I trust that God has incredible plans for these little ones, plans greater than I could ever imagaine. And though I love love them with an ocean of love, my love is but a drop compared to God's love for them. Our God is love.

Wednesday, June 2, 2010

Angels

As my last post stated, I made it to Zambia a-ok. Here's a bit of an update about the last few days.

Phil
I am thankful beyond words that I was able to fly with my brother for the majority of my trip. It gave me some awesome time to simply get to know him better. Plus, he is an incredible big bro. He let me tag along with him through the airports, bought me dinner, encouraged me, calmed my fears, made me laugh, gave me a tour of London, prayed for me; yeah, he's pretty amazing.

Mom
Amazing doesn't even begin to describe my mom. I'm so thankful for her patience and perserverance. She pushes me when I can't push myself. She's taught me love and truth. She puts up with my moodiness. She is an amazing example of a Christ follower. She encourages and prays for me constantly. Yeah, I'm pretty blessed. :-)

Woman on a plane
The woman sitting next to me on my plan trip from London to Joburg was quite literally a God-sent. This was probably the most stressful part of the journey. At this point, I know longer had my brother as a travel buddy, literally ran to catch my plane, was exhausted from traveling a full day already, was facing a bunch of unknowns, and was simply not a happy camper. As I raced onto my plane, I prayed for God to have me sit next to someone who would encourage me. Friends, our God answers prayer. Sitting next to me was the sweetest grandmother type Christian woman. At first, we didn't speak to each other, which I was ok with as I was already fighting tears. Our conversation started with a simple request to store her bag under the seat as we took off. She then started asking about my trip. I told her that I was going on from Joburg to Zambia. Which she asked me why, I told her God and briefly explained how I wanted to go to Joburg but instead God was leading me to Koloma (I spelled that wrong). In this, the tears started to flow. As I started to apologize for crying, she stopped me and comforted me. She was angel throughout the flight, treating me as if I were her granddaughter. As we parted ways, she blessed me and told me that she would pray for me.

Positively adorable.
This afternoon I had the privillage of spending time with 7 beautiful HIV positive toddlers at an orphanage. This little ones have already stolen my heart. There's no greater gift than the smiles on their faces. As they fought each other to sit on my lap and for my attention, my heart simply broke for them. Each should have their own mommy and daddy to fuss over them and shower them with love. This simply isn't how children should live. The orphanage is wonderful and the children are well taken care of, but babies simply need more love and attention that the orphanage could offer. Please pray for these precious little ones.

The Murphy Family
This family has made me feel more than welcome here. I so appriciate their willingness to meet me where I'm at, hear my story, and encourage me. Gretchen, my roommate, has been especially encouraging and has proven to be quite the compainion. She reminds me a lot of Laura (which is quite the compliment). :-)

God is good. Please pray that He continues to lead and guide me for His name sake.