Freedom

My prayer has been for God to lead and guide me for His name sake, that He would direct me in His plans.  And God has been faithful in answering this prayer, giving me direction and leadership.

Lately God has been revealing another piece of His guidance to me: God is not a tyrant or puppet master.  When we seek His will, He still gives us the freedom to choose if we will follow it.  Lately I've seen Him set up the perfect scenarios for me to do as He commands while still allowing me the freedom to choose my own way. He loves me enough to allow me to choose my own way; He leads out of love, not force.

An idea that I've heard before, but now see in a new light: how wonderful that the all powerful God and Creator of all things still gives us freedom and choice to follow Him!

Where You lead, LORD, I will follow

Scars

Joshua

Want an epic, action-packed story to read?  Check out the book of Joshua!

As I read through a few chapters of it today, I couldn't help but get caught up in the adventure of it, the epic battles, the greater defeats, the glory of God through it all.  And while reading, I could help but notice that:

-God kept reminding Joshua and the Israelite army to be strong and courageous, not afraid or discouraged, for He was with them.
-Israel and its God had quite the reputation among the surrounding nations
-Every victory was accredited to God and brought Him glory
-No enemy could stand up to God

Says something about being under the presence and provision of God, hey.

Where You lead, LORD, I will follow

The Clancy Clan

Yeah, it's gonna be a good year.  =)

Perhaps I spend too much time with children

Those who know me at all know that there's a sweet spot for kids in my heart.  God's given me a heart for these little ones, and my time reflects that heart as I care for babies 5 days a week, am enveloped by children on Sundays as I help with our kids ministry at church, and pretty much find any excuse to interact with the random kiddos that I encounter.

With all this time with children, I've come to admire their spirit.  Kids are just so full of life!  Especially in the two babes that I care for weekly, I see a great curiosity as everything is new to them, as they explore the world around them.  I love the enthusiasm of children!  I treasure the excitement of the 2 year old as we ventured off to the "jungle" on another adventure, the simply joy of the 7 year old responding to the museum as if it were Disney land, the grand adventure of the 5year old catching new bugs, the imagination of the eight year old scheming things not of this world, the innocent pride of the nine year old when she accomplishes a new task, the thrill of the 3 year old as she discovers the sweetness of life, the excited glee of the 9 month old as she takes her first steps, the contagious laugh of the 8 month old as he revels in tickles, the lively worship of the 8 year old as he dances his praises to Jesus, the passion of the 4 year old as he prays to God, the secure faith of the 6 year who declares confidently the character of God.

Yes, perhaps I spend too much time with children.  Yet through these interactions, God has challenged me.  God reminds me of the simple things in life, of the joy of the discovery of His creation and His character.  He reminds me of the goodness of simplicity and the pain of complicating His world and His promise.  He reminds me of the purity and joy of childlike faith.  He leaves me with a longing to be like this child, to love boundlessly and live fully, to find joy and excitement in every day life, to be not only content but enthusiastic about this day that the LORD has given me.

And calling to him a child, he put him in the midst of them and said, “Truly, I say to you, unless you turn and become like children, you will never enter the kingdom of heaven. Whoever humbles himself like this child is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven. “Whoever receives one such child in my name receives me, but whoever causes one of these little ones who believe in me to sin, it would be better for him to have a great millstone fastened around his neck and to be drowned in the depth of the sea.  Matthew 18:2-6 ESV

See that you do not despise one of these little ones. For I tell you that in heaven their angels always see the face of my Father who is in heaven.  Matthew 18:10 ESV

To live is Christ and to die is gain

While packing and preparing for our move this past weekend, I sorted through my things, deciding what would make the move with me, what would be given away, and what would be discarded.  In this process, I sorted through a bunch of papers from my undergrad career.  In this bunch, I came across a paper that I'd written right after I returned from South Africa; the topic of the paper was death.

As I read through its words, I concluded that I could not have been the author; the words seemed foreign to me, seemed to be written by one with much greater faith than I could ever possess.  The pages were filled with thoughts of dying young, of following Christ even when it requires my very life, of obedience to the death.  The paragraphs shone with thoughts of longing for death for death brings me closer to my Jesus.  Sentences rejecting the idea of life support, of medical interventions that would keep me from my Savior.

I was challenged by my own words.  Fresh from the mission field, I had a hunger for and faith in God that was unquenchable.  A hunger and faith that I long for now.  I long for that focus again, long to be rid of the daily distractions that keep my eyes from my God.  And convicted, too, for that focus, faith, and hunger are not bound to missionaries or those overseas; God calls all of His children to commune with Him.

Papa, forgive me for my distractions.  Forgive me for losing sight of what's truly important.  Forgive me for placing the temporary over the eternal.  Forgive me for not trusting Your plans over my own.  Forgive me for leaning on my own understanding.  Be my everything, LORD.  Baptize my mind.  Consume my heart.  Be my sole (and soul) desire.  You are God alone.  You are mighty to save.  LORD, lead and guide me for Your name sake.  May Your will be done and may You be glorified in my life.

I eagerly expectand hope that I will in no way be ashamed, but will have sufficient courage so that now as always Christ will be exalted in my body, whether by life or by death. ²¹ For to me, to live is Christ and to die is gain. ²² If I am to go on living in the body, this will mean fruitful labor for me. Yet what shall I choose? I do not know! ²³ I am torn between the two: I desire to depart and be with Christ, which is better by far; ²⁴ but it is more necessary for you that I remain in the body. ²⁵ Convinced of this, I know that I will remain, and I will continue with all of you for your progress and joy in the faith, ²⁶ so that through my being with you again your boasting in Christ Jesus will abound on account of me.  Philippians 1:20-26

Ode to 215

This past weekend we moved out of our apartment. As my roommate and I went about packing and cleaning into the wee hours of the night, nostalgia hit; as we lay on the floor of our now empty apartment for our final night there, the memories of all that's transpired over the past year flooded me.  As I drifted into exhaustion, my mind reflected on:

-My first day of seminary
-Singing Veggie Tales with my favorite Smell Smell
-Embracing the affectionate nickname of Smelly
-Running my first (and second and third) 5K
-Running my first half (and then some)
-Cheering on my brother in his first Ironman
-My nephew's birth
-Learning and embracing God's definition of beauty and identity
-Seeing God's perfect plan succeed again and again
-Learning to assert myself
-Leaving past bad habits for good
-Outrunning the Grinch
-Countless coffee dates with good conversation and great friends
- Shortie adventures
-The nanny effect
-My 1 year review at church
-Becoming a member of my church
-Getting involved in two incredible small groups
-Learning more about what godly relationships look like
-Saying goodbye to my grandma
-Camp sweet camp!
-Wrestling with what it truly means to be a disciple of Christ
-Watching once little ones that I love now become godly leaders
-Tank time!
-Flying with my mom for the first time
-Visit from my favorite Tennesseans
-Making a fireplace
-Getting to lead the kiddos at church
- Realizing I've been to Africa as many times as I've been to Chicago
-Witnessing restoration
-Striving for justice
-Prayer runs through the neighborhood
-Learning the power of prayer
-Lots of baking
-Ride for Refuge
-Birthday surprises
-Hair chopping
-Tree climbing
-Beach fun
-Laughing so hard we couldn't breath
-My first car accident
-Encouragement
-Incredible growth
-Humility
-New friends
-No fear
-Learning what faith really means
-Becoming confident in Christ
-Surrender
-Hope
- The wisdom of children
-Laughing with friends until we couldn't breath
-God kicking butt in spiritual warfare
-A cry for our daughters
-Strength
-Transformation
-Meeting a little Swedish princess
-Mattress races

God's blessed me in countless ways this past year.  Can't wait to see what He has in store next!

Where You lead, LORD, I will follow