The LORD gave and the LORD has taken away; may the name of the LORD be praised.

"Naked I came from my mother's womb, and naked I will depart. The LORD gave and the LORD has taken away; may the name of the LORD be praised." Job 1:21

Job's words best describe where I'm at right now. The LORD gave, and the LORD has taken away; may the name of the LORD be praised. The LORD gives, the LORD takes away. Still I will praise Him. His character remains the same. The LORD gives, and the LORD takes away.

This past week has been rough. God's really been challenging me. Long story short, the South Africa team from Cornerstone is off. There was a lot to bring us to this decision: safety concerns, communication issues, costs, just to name a few. But most importantly, God said don't go. For the past week I've been wrestling with this. Logically, there's a laundry list of reasons why we shouldn't go. But God is confined by our logic. His thinking is higher than ours could ever be. My going to South Africa this past semester didn't make logical sense either, but that was His plan. And His plan for this spring is for the CU team not to go. I have no idea why this is, but I know in my heart that this is what God wants. Though I don't like this reality and am disappointed, I have peace. This is what God has put on my heart.

The LORD gave and the LORD has taken away; may the name of the LORD be praised.

Oh to have the faith of Job! To lose everything, yet still praise God. I'm wrestling this with the South Africa team. I'm wrestling with this with my involvement with Africa in general. I don't know if God is asking me to, but I know that He's asking me if I'd be willing: willing to give up my love for and dreams of Africa if He calls me to do so. I can't see how this would make sense, but am I willing to do so if He asks me with? I wish I could give an affirmative yes, but to be honest it's something that I'll have to wrestle with for a while. I'd love for your prayers in this. Please pray that I learn to surrender every single part of myself to God, all of my hopes and dreams and being. Praying that nothing in this world could cause me to cease to praise His name. Pray that I can have faith like Job. Pray that God leads and guides me for His name sake. Pray that He becomes my only desire.

The LORD gave and the LORD has taken away; may the name of the LORD be praised.